Glee Episode Retrospectives: Silly Love Songs and Heart

Happy Valentines Day all!

Or as I like to call it Single Awareness Day because I am acutely aware how single I am.

Here’s a Valentine’s Day card. Everyone deserves one.

So another tradition that glee seems totally invested in is the Valentine’s Day episodes.

Which like the Christmas episodes make a lot of sense because well there are a shit ton of love songs of any type in the world. It makes logical sense for a show as invested in music as glee would go this route.

However, unlike the Christmas episodes which has been hit or miss with viewers the Valentine’s episodes have been more hit than miss (season four episode fourteen “I Do” has yet to be seen).

So before tonight when you curl up with a box of store bought chocolates and curse all the schmoopy couples on Valentine’s Day (me). Or on the other hand when you curl up with your significant other who you were able to convince the episode with you. We should definitely take a look at both of these episodes.

So let’s start shall we!

(Spoilers for season two episode twelve “Silly Love Songs” and season three episode thirteen “Heart”. Possibly others as well. So go spoil yourself before reading this.)

“Silly Love Songs” is more of an episode about falling in love versus being in love. Most of the characters in the episode are crushing on other characters. Only one song in the whole episode is sang by a person in a past established relationship (“P.Y.T. Pretty Young Thing” sung by Artie with dancing by Mike Chang). The rest of the songs are the crushing characters making their respective moves toward that other person to success or failure.

Which, I think, is a pretty solid approach to tackling a high school Valentine’s Day episode. Most so called love in high school is really just a crush, a passing fancy.

And that is pretty much the plot of the episode: relationship drama.

Relationship drama in glee is a science unto itself bitches.

Now normally relationship drama has me rolling my eyes. Don’t get me wrong here people. I do like the occaisional drama in a relationship on TV. However, it seems like every character on television has some type of relational drama. In fact, I have come to prefer relatively stable relationships because they seem to be rarity on television. In glee terms I’m more of a fan of couples like Tike and Jarley than Finchel and Klaine.

Why? Because Tike and Jarley are actually relatively stable and happy together. There are small bumps but they deal with them. And okay I think Jarley is moving a little too fast but whatever they’re still more stable than some of the other New Directions couplings we’ve seen.

Finchel has gone through so much that I don’t think I’ve ever seen people so ill suited to each other in my life. You want them to be the endgame, glee? You need Rachel and Finn to find a better place where their relationship will not be toxic to each other. Granted looking at their past relationships well I can see why they would have issues with romance.

Klaine isn’t as bad for me. I do like Klaine. Chris Colfer and Darren Criss worked had to cultivate a good and comfortable onscreen chemistry with each other. However, they made the foolish mistakes of childhood. Blaine cheated on Kurt and I don’t think the show adequately addressed the repercussions of it. They need to show Kurt and Blaine build up trust rather than just have them mash together. Better yet, have them be in new relationships and grow.

Sorry I went on a rant there.

So “Silly Love Songs” is all about crushing and trying obtain the person of your affections through music.

Some work better than others.

Alright first couple up is Pizes a.k.a. Puck and Lauren Zizes!

Now this was an interesting couple. Before Samcedes there was Pizes.

Pizes love!

A.K.A. where the big chick won the heart of the handsome popular boy.

Lauren isn’t like Quinn or Rachel or Santana. She has an inner confidence that she is hot and fuck the haters because what do they know? She also is cautious with her heart and proves to be a true match for Puck.

She doesn’t fall for Puck’s games.

And that’s what makes this an interesting relationship to watch develop. Puck sings “Fat Bottomed Girls” to her and she shuts him down. He gets her chocolate and she shuts him down again. She ever stands him up on their Valentine’s date because she doesn’t trust his reputation.

She knows how Puck functions and she blocks every step of the way. Looking back on it, this was a fun and interesting relationship to watch. I was kind of upset when they didn’t go for it more in future seasons.

So now onto the second couple focused on in “Silly Love Songs” Klaine.

Soooo I am tots in love with someone. And it’s not you, Kurt. AWKWARD SILENCE!

Well kind of.

Kurt finds out Blaine has a crush on someone.

Who is not Kurt.


Still Kurt, who is equal parts till scary crushing and friends with Blaine, decides to help out by getting the Warblers to perform at the Gap for Blaine’s crush: Jeremiah. Also the Warblers continue their proud tradition of choosing the most horrible inappropriate songs for the image.

Jeremiah is less than impressed. Kurt is fed up with pining for Blaine and reveals his feelings for him because Blaine is oblivious. And they sing at a Lonely Hearts dinner at Breadstix with the weight of Kurt’s feelings hanging between them.

So what does this say about crushing?

Sometimes infatuation really freaking sucks.

Blaine is infatuated by Jeremiah. Who is this suave older Gap employee. He likes the idea of someone older, of someone taking care of him. And when it doesn’t work out, he feels lost even. However, the Kurt having a crush on him throws Blaine into a tailspin because Blaine Anderson is clueless about when people have a crush on him until they tell him.

Kurt is also infatuated by Blaine. “Silly Love Songs” though puts them on slightly more equal footing. Kurt realizes that he can’t keep crushing on Blaine if Blaine is not interested. There needs to be some distance between them for them to truly become friends.

The final relationship thing is the Rachel-Finn-Quinn-Sam love square-ish thing.

Which is just such bullshit.

Really Finn you feel “fireworks” with Quinn and that’s a magically good enough reason to cheat with her on Sam?!


I hope that the world’s shortest case of Mono that you and Quinn had contracted from avenging Santana sucked!

Behold the world’s sexiest avenging nurse angel of revenge.

Also Rachel gets really sad and sings a song about personal empowerment by Katy Perry. Because that’s what you do in glee.


The next week she immediately goes right back to pining learning nothing at all. And the twitch below my eye got a little worse.

So “Silly Love Songs” like “A Very Glee Christmas” (season ten of episode two) actually set up a rather strong start for the glee Valentine’s Day episodes. The story written by Ryan Murphy is one of the few episodes by him that I can say I legitimately enjoyed. There was great pacing and good interplay between characters. The whole Rachel-Finn-Quinn-Sam love square thing was definite bullshit but I can forgive that. Overall the episode was solid. It had pretty good music. It had a good story. It had

Now let’s talk about the other glee Valentine episode “Heart”.

This episode is big for three reasons.

1) It’s the beginning of the Karofsky’s spiral to suicide.

Awww. Daaaaave.

2) It’s the introduction of Joe Hart played by The Glee Project winner Samuel Larsen.

Hi Teen Hippie Jesus!!!! You’re tots adorable.

3) It’s the introduction of Hiram and LeRoy Berry.

This shirt he’s wearing has more personality than Jeff Goldblum usually has.

So yeah on the whole the episode was an interesting one. And it focused more on established relationships than anything else. The good and the bad aspects of them were put into the spotlight. Along with dealing with old relationships and new crushes too.

Again it’s another episode on relationship drama.

Let’s look back at it shall we?

Alright first thing is first the Kurtofsky plot.

Blaine is still recovering from his cornea operation thing because Darren Criss was on Broadway so Kurt is going to be alone for Valentine’s Day. Anyway he gets these mysterious gorilla-grams (is this a legit thing? Does it say ‘I’m ape about you’ or something?) that he thinks are from Blaine. They are not from Blaine but rather Dave Karofsky: still closeted but former bully of Kurt Hummel who has a bit of a crush on him.

Honey we need to work on your manscaping.

Actually this stuff between Kurt and Karofsky is some of the strongest stuff in the episode.

Why? Because it starts to provide a resolution of Karofsky’s story (not a good one and I’ll get into that another time). Kurt is actually very gentle with Karofsky here. He doesn’t want to hurt his feelings because he knows what a big step this is for the other guy to admit his attraction to Kurt and to take the steps to do something about it. It shows a lot of growth on Dave’s part. The scene is very sweet and touching.

Awesome acting going on here folks. Learn it.

And it also provides a set up for the next episode (season three episode fourteen “On My Way”) when one of Karofsky’s new classmates catches the two at Breadstix talking. This shows a fairly deft hand writing wise from Ali Adler, who writes strong connecting episodes. The talk was very sweet and Dave running out was overrun by the Valentine’s Day party so you didn’t think about it again until the next week when well the incident happened.

The next plot focuses on the introduction to Joe Hart a.k.a. Teen Hippie Jesus.

God Bless Joe Hart. He puts adorable back in Christian.

Unlike Rory, I liked Joe. Sorry to say Rory just came off creepy in his introductory episode and it never really left despite his lovely voice. You were just a victim of bad writing there Rory. However, Alder seemed to have learned from her mistakes in “Pot O’ Gold” and rectified them here in “Heart”. Granted Joe’s story is a bit of a weak one but it is a valid one.

Joe has joined the God Squad, which is a Christian club at the school staffed by Mercedes, Sam and Quinn. (And yes I checked public schools can have religious clubs so long as they meet after school. So it’s valid.) The God Squad has decided to raise money by doing singing telegrams because New Directions isn’t doing it this year (when did they do it last year?). They do one from Finn to Rachel in the courtyard.

Santana hears this and for some reason decides to challenge Joe by demanding they sing a song from her to Brittany. Joe does not know how he feels about this as he has never met a gay person before due to being home schooled. However, after a lot of off screen praying Joe realizes that love is love and sings the song with the rest of the God Squad.

It’s a fairly simple plot but it sets Joe up and we understand the kind of person he is.

What confuses me is the God Squad’s debate on singing a song to openly gay and out couple. WHO ARE THEIR FRIENDS! WHAT THE HELL GUYS?!

Yeah you could have had this moral dilemma several seasons ago but not now! You don’t get to have a debate about your religion and sexuality now. Not when EVERYONE assumed that you were okay with it and you never really had an “issue” with it until this moment.

Seriously what the fuck here? It’s just such a stupid thing to do. Instead of focusing on this bullshit, you could have used the time to develop Joe a little more here and his struggles reconciling his religion and the outside world for what it is.

That scene is the weakest and most rage inducing part of the episode for me. I need something to calm me down.

Adorable Asian Smoochies!!!!! Awww!!! I miss Tike.

Awwww! The Tike adorableness quells my rage.

Oh! Right there is a Rory-Sugar-Artie bullshit that has zero chemistry with Sugar and the two guys. Because Rory and Artie had more chemistry with each other than with Sugar.

Now let’s talk about Hiram and LeRoy Berry.

We’re not the guys from the pilot.

Okay so really this is focusing on Finchel rather than Hiram and LeRoy here.


Look once upon a time I was really into Finchel but at this point I just need them to stop pining over each other and find other people and grow. Rather than them just shoving together again and again in order to get themselves to work as a couple.

Right so this was from the very strange, Finn and Rachel engagement/getting married plot.

Hiram and LeRoy do not want this to happen and instead of telling their daughter this/threaten to cut her off financially. They go the route of the “wacky” plan of having Finn spend the night with Rachel.

Truth be told it’s a pretty good plant. It shows how ill prepared for marriage and living together, Finn and Rachel are. Love is letting your boyfriend take a dump in the bathroom while you’re brushing your teeth.

Really. That is trust and love.

Rachel freaks out and they have a fight.

And instead of rationally talking about how unprepared they are for this, Finn and Rachel make up and snuggle and I roll my eyes. Seriously these two are not ready for marriage and they dragged this out against our will.

God I need something beautiful right now.

Thank you Mercedes.

Yes this episode aired right after Whitney Houston’s untimely demise. Ironic considering that they were covering her best known song on the show. Amber Riley absolutely killed it and I was in tears after the episode ended. There really was no musical number after that sheer amazingness.

So why do I say “Silly Love Songs” and “Heart” are good episodes despite my problems with them? It’s because they are still executed well. The scripts are solid enough that I can forgiven any flubs. The stuff that pisses me off is stuff that was pushed later on in the season or stuff that was pre-existing before the episodes had aired. The characters were fun in the episodes. There was good music and a nice atmosphere.

It felt like how Valentine’s Day always feels: a little bit awkward but even more romantic.

So from me to you have a Happy Valentine’s Day guys.

Or Single Awareness Day.

Or Valentine’s Day Massacare Day.

Remember this day of love and painful single awareness is also a day when a bunch of mobsters got whacked!

NEXT ON THE GLEE REWATCH PROJECT: Bad Glee Theatre, character retrospective or a list of songs.

Follow Me: @GleeRewatch for the latest updates. If you want there is always my personal account (though why I have no clue). Also I am a contributor for PopWrapped so check out my V-Day recap when that comes out!

Notes: Sorry if this is too short. It’s a school week but I wanted to have it up for today. Also I got a Mac so I’m still getting used to it so forgive any flubs in the piece.

Credit: Glee Wiki
Glee seasons 2 and 3 on DVD
Google Images


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